Well, before I catch any strays let me just say it is the council by-law officers who are saying this. After years and years of sitting back and watching the city residents eat unhygienic food the officers got an epiphany and decided to sanction all the eateries whose hygiene is questionable. Most of these eateries and restaurants are seemingly run by people who think ‘cleaning’ is a suggestion, not a practice. Very soon we will starve to near-death. Eateries are being closed by the by-law enforcement officers faster than MP Mabeo’s follow-up questions at the Public Accounts Committee hearings. It looks like most bakery pans in GC store bakeries were last cleaned when Mzilikazi coursed through our country on his way to Matebeleland. Most of our eateries are grime scenes actually. It looks like the grime has been accumulating on their cooking utensils from as far back as when they invented the wheel. It’s like the eateries have a special machine designed to extract hygiene from their operations. Most eateries are capable of cleaning every little corner of their operation except where they prepare food for human (?) consumption. When you enter the stores they are cleaned and polished.
When you get to where they prepare the food it seems every eatery complies with Resolution 69 (ii) that was coined during the Annual Poor Restaurant Hygiene Conference. It goes thus: do not clean whatever you use for preparing food and make sure you recycle cooking oil at least 362 times before disposing and buying fresh cooking oil. The sheer horror of turning on BTV News and seeing a cockroach as a superhero of sorts in the Unhygienic Restaurants Soapie is stuff for the Weird and Wacky World. There’s a bright side to this though. Forget the health inspector with their clipboard and disapproving frown. Forget the hidden cameras trying to catch violations.
