Of floods, collapsing bridges and suave suits

• There is no need to panic.

• We could all be killed. It is vitally important that one keeps abreast of the situation by turning on their television and watching TV reporters in rain slickers stand right next to a flood plain and telling you over and over how vitally important it is for everybody to stay the hell away from flood plains. Journalists are equipped with tonnes of bravery garnered from their training in Bravery Basics class.