This article is a worthy continuance of the former on incompatibilities that may be existent in an ordinary healthy relationship despite the parties being compatible.
These differences may sometimes fascinate lovers when they are still riding on the emotional high of a new romance. Nonetheless, when the novelty of a new love wears off, these dissimilarities may become more pronounced in the relationship and sometimes trigger conflict. Intuitive v Logical - The degree of our intuition or logic determines our daily decisions, analysis and problem-solving skills. Some people predominantly lean more on their intuition or hunches when making decisions e.g. A may strike a business deal because his/her hunch tells him/her that the deal will make him a kill. This may be contrary to any evidence that the deal will yield tangible results. On the other hand, others rest more on their logic e.g. B may never cut a business deal unless most of the facts depict that there is a high probability of success. When the intuitive is in love with the logical, the parties may sometimes toil to find common ground when making decisions due to their varying fashions of decision making.
Optimist v Pessimist - The optimist is a dreamer, they always see the glass full, they always see possibilities where there are impossibilities, they always see rivers where there is a wilderness. When the optimist takes a risk, they focus more on what they may gain, and makes a decision based on their potential gains. The pessimist is generally skeptical, and sees thorns where there are flowers. They see darkness where there is light. Whenever they take a risk, they focus more on what they may lose. The optimist has a more fulfilled life with lesser regrets as they are risk takers. Nonetheless they may fail to identify dangers that could jeopardise their dreams and goals at times. Contrariwise, the pessimist may mostly live a safe yet dull life. The pessimist may, however, always do a thorough preparation and practice due diligence whenever they choose to take a leap of faith. This means that they may take a much longer time to make decisions compared to the optimist which may occasionally lead to disharmony in the relationship. The downside of their delay means that opportunities may pass them by at times.
The upside is that they may be better braced to handle most of the challenges they may encounter whenever they choose to take risks. Organised v Disorganised - Some humans are more organised and neater. In some instances, such ilk is ever cleaning and rarely rests when they are home. The organised kind are also ever punctual.
The disorganised may sometimes struggle to meet their deadlines on time, they may have clothes strewn all over their closet etc. These disorganised habits may leave their organised partner agitated at times. Interestingly, the disorganised bae may occasionally find themselves ruffled by their sweetheart’s very high standards which they may fail to meet at times. Blind spots - this denotes weaknesses that we may not be conscious of but are so patent to our lovers; areas of fallibility that we are blind to unless brought up by our loved ones, quirks and nuances that can tarnish the sparkle of love if light and action are not shed on us. These may include being controlling and demanding that things go our way all the time even if it prejudices the collective interests of the relationship, stonewalling your darling for prolonged periods of time, habitually creating no time to spend with your beloved. Gender based differences - Men and women are similar yet dissimilar.
They are similar by virtue of being human and equal. They are unlike as an upshot of their biological make up. For example, most men crave to feel needed and trusted in a relationship whereas a lot of women long to feel loved and cherished in a romance. When the varying genders do not accord each other’s needs, fittingly discord may relentlessly linger in their union. The latter article will be a worthy continuance of this one.
•Gaone Monau is a practicing attorney and motivational speaker. For bookings on gender-based violence awareness seminars, motivational talks or consultations on relationships, confidence building, stress management and self-discovery contact +26774542732 or [email protected] Her Facebook page is Be Motivated with Gaone.