Know When To Speak Floral English :: Mmegi Online

Obviously there’s a select few who drank from the fountain of floral English in that arduous education journey while a huge number of us just gargled. The former obviously found an extra weapon for life’s everyday struggles.

Today I will try and provide an Idiot’s Guide To When To Speak Floral English. I am sharply aware that most people don’t ever read Idiot’s Guides. Strangely even real idiots hardly ever bother.

But I am a positive and hopeful individual so I hope to ensnare a few of you. But what is floral English? I have searched many dictionaries but it is not there. So I will try my best to explain it slowly because I know most of you who read this column - just like me - merely gargled from the fountain of floral English. It is rose-coloured, petunia-flavoured, daisy-sprinkled and orchid-dashed English that is mainly spoken to pad up one’s importance and annoy the garglers-type. In political circles floral English is a requirement at press conferences, Parliament, freedom squares and choir practices. In the floral English barometer these register very high readings.

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Know When To Speak Floral English

Obviously there’s a select few who drank from the fountain of floral English in that arduous education journey while a huge number of us just gargled. The former obviously found an extra weapon for life’s everyday struggles.

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