Speaking at a session held exclusively for fathers and sons here on Saturday, Bishop Themba Mntambo said fathers had a critical role to play in the healthy development of their sons."Listen to your sons when they talk," he said. "Look at them and observe their body language. Don't assume that because they are small they will not teach you anything valuable."Bishop Mntambo - a former lecturer in conflict and peace studies at Nelson Mandela Metropolitan University - oversees South Africa's Limpopo District that includes the provinces of the North West, Mpumalanga, parts of Gauteng, Limpopo itself and all the church's circuits in Botswana.He said fathers were far more than just 'second adults' in homes because they had a direct impact on the wellbeing of their children
"Involved fathers bring positive benefits to their children that no other person is likely to bring," he observed.
"One of the most important influences a father can have on his son is indirect: Fathers influence their children in a large part through the quality of their relationship with the mother of the children."A father who has a good relationship with the mother of their children is more likely to have children who are likely to be involved and to spend time with their children and to have children who are psychologically and emotionally healthier."He noted that children with involved and caring fathers also had better educational outcomes. He referred to studies that suggested that fathers who were involved, nurturing and playful with their infants had children with a higher intelligence quotient and better linguistic and cognitive capacities.Similarly, fathers who treated the mothers of their children with respect and dealt with conflict within the relationship in an adult and appropriate manner were more likely to have boys who understood how they were to treat women and who were less likely to act in an aggressive fashion towards females.
