The abuse of parents by their children refers to any act by the child, that causes physical, emotional or economic harm to the parent. It is a form of domestic violence as parents are routinely intimidated, called names, verbally terrorised by being insulted and generally undermined by their children. Social workers say that a child who refuses to do domestic chores preferring instead to go out or just idle around, for instance, is an abuser. They say that some children cause profound economic and emotional pain to their parents by stealing from them. The stealing could include cash or household property which is then sold for cash usually to facilitate the purchase of alcohol, drugs or other items of choice. Children, for instance, who refuse to go to school, abuse their parents because they hurt them. The emotional and economic stress that a parent is caused by a child who steals the family car and gets into trouble with the police constitutes abuse by the child. Other parent abusers, according to social work professionals, especially girls, leave their own offspring with their parents to look after while they go and have fun. The arrangement becomes more poignant and exploitative when the parent is not rewarded, for example, by being looked after. This forces the parent to use his or her own meager resources to care for the child and sometimes the mother as well. In some cases, the child might be working but fails to look after the parent who has been turned into a babysitter. Jacqueline Ookeditse, a vendor acknowledges that many parents are victims of abuse by their children. "One of the reasons why this is so is that children are taught only about their rights and nothing about responsibilities," she says. While she endorses the concept of rights for children, Ookeditse says that children need to know that they have no choice but to respect their parents. Jenamiso Tawa, who runs a taxi in Francistown blames parents for abusive children arguing that children who become abusive were brought up by parents whose parenting skills leave much to be desired. "A good parent is firm with his or her children so that they do not grow up to be spoilt brats," he concludes. Archbishop Mbakiso Mpapho of Phodisong the First Stone Church in Zion advices that for peace to prevail in the family, the children should be introduced to God at an early age. In his view, children who grow up in the church respect, not only their parents but other elders because that is the law of God. Christian children are able to empathise with their parents, he adds.
"People should not abandon the traditional way of bringing up children where members of the extended family as well as neighbours and other adults could discipline any wayward child without deferring to the biological parents, " further says the Archbishop. Mpapho says he talks to his children regularly telling them what he expects of them.
