My diabetic son, my inspiration
Correspondent | Friday June 17, 2016 14:34
I didn’t know what type 1 diabetes was nor did I know what BG and insulin were. What I knew was when your child gets sick, you give them medicine and rest and they get better. This time, I could not make the condition go away; it was there to stay no matter what.
I remember when he was hospitalised at Gaborone Private Hospital for seven days. He was with his dad as I had to be with our younger one-year-old son, he kept on asking us what diabetes was.
He asked how long it would take till he no longer had to take the frequent insulin injections. As a parent, how do you answer that to your child? Do you say diabetes is a chronic and killer disease, do you say injections are now a lifetime thing? We battled to answer his innocent questions and this ripped my heart to pieces, especially when he cried that he did not want injections as they were painful.
After being discharged from hospital, he came home and had to be tested about four times a day. I could not stand him being pricked on his little tender fingers. As if the prick was not enough, it would then be followed by an injection on his arm. His arms had to take five injections per day. I could not inject him, my husband did all the glucose testing and insulin injection for about two months. I could not stand hurting my son with endless pricks and injections. “No,” I told myself, then I would sob after seeing his dad give him the insulin shot.
It did get better with time, however. After about two months, I started watching and getting used to it. With the insulin shots, our son started to look so much better and regained his energy. Each time I had to give him his insulin, it felt like a knife was going through my heart. I cried many times after giving him an injection, yet he coped very well. I was so proud of him when he would ask to inject himself with the pen.
But we still could not bring ourselves to accepting his condition. We could not accept that we were unable to help our son and take it all away. We battled to cope and understand this and ended up pushing our loved ones away from us. I turned into this shouting and screaming monster of a mother. I would also feel so sad and sorry for my one-year-old son who just did not understand what was going on with his brother, why he was being pricked and injected all the time and why mummy was always crying and shouting so much.
I literally cut off all friends and family. I became depressed and was put on anti-depressants. With my pillar by my side, my husband, this helped me to cope better and I gradually came to accept and understand things more positively. I cannot say I have accepted my son’s diabetes years after his diagnosis, but I can say I understand it better.
What a lonely and painful year 2013 was. Aren’t I glad 2013 is history!
Now I have decided I should not be alone in this fight. I need friends that can support me and our son. I have joined YWD in Botswana (Youth with Diabetes). We are also thinking of starting our own support group called Kids Powered by Insulin because these children literally need insulin to give them the power to help them run, think and play. We do not want any parent of any child with type 1 diabetes to have to do it alone. I want us to laugh and cry together, scream and vent, but most of all to be there for each other.
Being a parent of a diabetic child is hard going, the constant monitoring, the calculations, the night checks, all on top of normal family life and working full time. People think because diabetes can be regulated with medication that it is not that serious, but every day is a struggle and every day we do the same routine just to keep our child alive.
I know that our son’s diabetes was not caused by anything we did wrong. I have sort of accepted the ‘enemy’ and we are trying hard to live in harmony with diabetes, but we still get to bump heads ...often. However, I remain the mother and I will never allow this enemy/friend to control my son or my family. We make the rules, we get to control it. Nisim is amazing and so brave. He now never complains about his injections. I am so proud that he is mine and diabetes does not hold him back and hold out hope that a cure will be found. Our son’s name is, NISIM, is of Arabic origin and means fresh breeze. How true this is. He is our fresh breeze to life.
My dear son, I am so proud of all your achievements. You are truly destined for great things in life. You are my inspiration, my whole world and I love you for the wonderful boy you are. Thank you for teaching us the lessons of acceptance and gratefulness. You are our little hero, our fresh breeze!
* Mitchell Gebrial, a mother and wife, is an award winning businesswoman and co-owner of Sprint Couriers