Hello, there are NO blessers in this country!

Tumie Modise | Monday June 13, 2016 15:22

For believers, the word is synonymous with a blessed life in terms of a loving marriage, obedient intelligent children, a vibrant ministry, a healthy body, a successful career, trusted friends and financial abundance. All these are characteristics of a blessed life, and having all of them usually translates into an extraordinarily blessed life.

Furthermore, and this isn’t me in a religious trance, scriptures show that a blessing is anything God gives that makes us FULLY satisfied in him, that which draws us closer to Him. Anything that helps us relinquish the temporal and hold on more tightly to the eternal. And often it is the struggles and trials, the aching disappointments and the unfulfilled longings that best enable us to do that. That is the true meaning of blessed and until recently, it was the only legitimate meaning.

We are not only changing history but we are even hell bent (pun intended) on re-writing the Bible as well. In 2016 a #Blesser is a new and revised version of ‘sugar daddy’, except his spending power puts him on a much higher pedestal, giving him a god-like status of sorts. And when you date one, it is said you literally feel like your life has been blessed. Fiscally, at least.

A friend asked me for my opinion concerning this #blesser phenomenon a few days ago. To this day he does not believe me when I say I am not aware of any blessers/blessee arrangements in this country. Admittedly I have been ‘around’ for a while but I swear this is one topic that is still all Greek to me, as in, I do not have any firsthand experience about it.  The only blessers I know are the ones I have been reading about in other neighbouring countries and I have this sick feeling that he didn’t exactly believe me. The little research I have done overwhelmingly supports me though; such people simply don’t exist in this country.  Worse, even auto word correct keeps rejecting this word!

But these blessers, as I keep learning, are evidently not in the same league as the now extinct sugar daddies and it could be that we confuse the two. Sugar daddies were the bees’ knees in the 90’s. Their sole existence was to provide basic things such as pocket money, groceries and airtime mostly to tertiary students. Most of the time they did not do this willingly and there was always a transaction of some sort. Also, they were not necessarily monied folks, just the working class. They were also notorious for demanding gifts and favours back form girls if they didn’t get their way. I know a lot of girls from the 90’s who had the misfortune (and embarrassment) of being kicked out of their rented low cost houses by these broke people. A housemate had her Chicco (car) repossessed in the middle of the night at a popular eatery after ignoring annoying calls the whole day. We walked home that day. Blessers, as I am learning, ‘bless’ their women financially with shopping sprees, overseas trips and pricey pampering sessions. Money for them, is no object. Also, word doing the rounds is that blessers are the main reason why the air route to Dubai and back is so popular and profitable nowadays, apparently it is their number one preferred overseas destination. I am yet to visit Dubai.

Why do I say they don’t exist here? We are a nation in debt; all the people in my circle are broke around the 15th of every month. The few that have money keep very low profiles and they only frequent coffee shops when everybody else is broke. Even then, they tip waitresses just like the rest of us, with just a few coins. Not only that they also have this Botswana (man) mentality of accounting for every thebe spent. They even keep receipts in their wallets. A typical Motswana man would want to tag along and observe their woman as they shop with the intention of checking out the price tag on every item purchased, all the time making funny faces, the type of faces that women make during labour. A blank cheque is something they see in movies; they demand receipts and change after every shopping trip. If you have to do your nails and hair, a ‘rough’ cost estimation will be sought, or you’ll be coerced into shaving off your hair altogether!

These people don’t exist in this country and until someone proves me wrong, it is my story and I am standing by it.