Men encouraged to be part of their children�s lives
Nnasaretha Kgamanyane | Thursday November 20, 2014 11:29
He made these remarks in relation to the International Men’s Day that was commemorated yesterday under the theme, “Promoting positive involvement of men as fathers and carers”.
“The main aim of the theme is promoting men’s responsibilities as fathers. It saddens me to see men neglecting and abandoning their children.
Most men locally think that being a father is only about feeding, dressing and giving their children all the material things money can buy,” he said.
He said culturally, there used to be a myth that children belong to their mother while fathers see to their material needs. He said this should not be, as men also have the right to be responsible for their children’s upbringing as much as the women.
He encouraged men to pull up their socks and be fathers whom their offspring can be proud of. He said that this will help them develop a strong bond and relationship.
Langwane said one of the things that hinder local men to take care of their children is doubt.
“Doubting that a child is yours is one of the things that leaves a rift between you and your children. I don’t know why you should neglect your children because you think that the kid may not be yours.
“No matter what your doubts may be, take care of those children because maybe someone elsewhere might be taking care of your own child,” he added.
He also pointed out that some men tend to neglect their children who were born out of wedlock or illegitimate children as many call them.
He called on all men to step up and take responsibility for their children.
Furthermore, he told the gathering that even though there was no law that requires men to claim their children and care for them, the Children’s Act of 2009 points out that no parent is a better parent than the other. He said that the Act states that custody of a child is made in the best interest of the child.
“Every parent must have access to their child either married or not. The law gives every parent the right to be part of his or her children’s lives either legitimate or not. Gone are the days where illegitimate children were thrown out,” he added.
Langwane emphasised that men have the right to the children that they have brought into the world regardless of the circumstances of their lives or of how they had those children.
For his part, Reverend Rupert Hambira said men are similar regardless of their educational background. He pointed out that men are generally suspicious that the children may not be theirs and that maybe theirs were growing up in another man’s home.
He added that as a result the men sometimes neglect taking care of the children growing up in their own homes.
“Where a man suspects that a child is not theirs, it is a symbol that there in no trust or love in the family,” he added.
Hambira encouraged men to take part in their children’s lives and refrain from running away from their responsibilities by accusing their partners of cheating on them after they are told of the pregnancy.