Mind your business

Tumie Modise | Monday October 6, 2014 06:59

A long time ago, it is said that there existed people known as ‘village gossips’. Fast forward to the 21st century, everyone is now a gossip of repute. Age, creed, gender and societal standing have nothing to do with it. The only prerequisites to being one is having a mouth, eyes and an idle mind. Now this stranger I encountered, I did not know her. I still don’t. 

But the most interesting part is that on this particular day she swore to the whole world via social media that she was going to “destroy” me, for no particular reason really. While it still does not bother me, it nevertheless inspired this particular write up, so all credit must go to this person. 

I am more convinced that the real reason why Batswana, particularly women, never really go far in this country is because of their fear, constant judging and bad vibes. But then again, common talk is that if you see a woman in distress then you know for sure that another is behind it! People, not only women, always make a point that everyone remains on the same level as themselves; anything else is an insult to them!

Strangely though, men often don’t suffer this same fate. Going back to the issue of village gossips, legend also has it that this exclusive gossip club was only open to women and not to men. How things have changed, how the world has fast evolved. Because now, men lead the gossips stakes and are no different from women nowadays! No one is safe from intrusion, no one is immune from others judging or from constant nods of disapproval. 

I have long declared my intense dislike for hospitals and it is for the simple reason that nurses and doctors make your health their core business. I think it part of their pledge. Like for months now, I have been postponing a minor procedure I have to do at a local hospital. My fear is simple: I fear that once I am wheeled into theater in all my glory, a real likelihood exists that someday I will come across my theatre nude pictures on social media. 

Or maybe I am just being paranoid, but privacy still matters to me, as I am sure it does to everybody else. Still on the issue of doctors, some of them have no qualms with sharing their patient’s secrets at dinner tables. It does not even help that recently, a law giving them a blank cheque to share their patient’s statues with their families and caregivers, was passed. Lawyers are the worst bunch, as are their secretaries. There is just nowhere to run!

Some people even don’t fear making God’s business their personal business. They have no qualms playing God from time to time, nor do they even fear Him. Some months ago I nearly died of laughter after I read about a very bizarre (but real) incident that happened somewhere in Gaborone. One worshiper is said to have left church with his head bowed down in embarrassment after an overzealous preacher literally rinsed and hung him out to dry, in full glare of the congregation. The man, perhaps like me, has an intense dislike for clinics and on that fateful day, had preferred to see his preacher over Men’s Clinic for his nagging ailment. 

Unbeknownst to him though, consultations and diagnosis at that particular church are done outside worship hours with treatments only reserved for live church services. I doubt he shall be returning to that church anytime soon!  

There is also the issue of marriages. Marriages are by law conducted in public and that should ring a bell to anyone. Because once you get married, your old life as you knew it, immediately ceases to exist! No one will ever tells you about this.  Because from then on, your marriage not only becomes the state’s business, but everyone’s business including your village, families, friends’ and even your employer’s business! “Lo tlhwatswa lesire leng?” is usually the first point of intrusion.

Then of course, there is my old neighbor. For every time he hears my gate opening at night, he leaps, peeps through the curtain before shouting, ‘is everything okay my friend’? I get that my neighborhood isn’t the safest and that he is a caring neighbor, I only hate that he is just obsessed with my gate.