When a person is fed up with life

Tumie Modise | Monday July 14, 2014 16:14

While I appreciate the role that religious leaders play during bereavement, I have always found myself aggrieved with some of their teachings concerning crossing over to the other world. I have attended many funerals and lately I find myself increasingly biting my tongue and rolling my eyes whenever the anointed ones take to the podium to deliver eulogies to the departed, or is it to the living? My mother always takes offence whenever she’s at a funeral and such messages are read. All things being regular and normal, condolence messages are meant to ‘console’ the bereaved and not console the departed. But with us, 99% of the messages are often directed to the departed person.

 Then there is the issue of Abraham and his legendary bottomless bosom. You cannot miss those, you just can’t! I always mean to check out this part on the Bible, there must be something I am missing here. For one thing, death just terrifies me. Even at my lowest moments (and they have been many), I have never once thought I would be better off at some graveyard. Yet I know I am not immortal, no one is. But it cracks me every time I am at a funeral and the ‘huba saga Abrahama message is read out. One preacher who shares my beliefs concerning death once asked whether even after a thousand plus years, this poor saint’s bosom is not full yet? Will some of us find any space left at all? I am never the one to challenge the holy book and its teachings, but throughout my church going days (which is all my life), not once had I ever heard any preacher in my church making any reference to Abraham’s allegedly gigantic bosom, especially at funerals. It’s a little consolation, because I would have been tempted to differ with my church’s ideology on that one.

Being fearful of death is just basic human instinct. I even have a feeling that people who take their own lives also fear death and I am in total agreement with the research that shows that for one to commit suicide, they have to have been somehow a little disturbed up their heads. Not my words. Suicide is a sore topic for many people; it is taboo in some cultures and it is devastating to the families affected. Rumour also has it that it’s genetically inclined. For some establishments such as the police and the military, it is disdained and a big no-no! Anybody in these two establishments who takes the suicide route automatically forfeits the right to a decent and dignified send-off.

It is the rule and it is not negotiable. The victim will forego the rights to all the trappings that surround a dignified burial such as the often colorful but terrifying 21-gun salute (whatever that means). I still don’t know the significance of this gun salute, all I am certain of is that for a number of people, it can be very disturbing and terrifying too. It doesn’t help that some of us still have fears of everything military..

Still on the issue of taboos, I know for a fact that some religions, if not all of them, generally frown upon suicide. I don’t think they hate people who commit suicide; I suppose they only condemn the act of taking a life. While I cannot be certain of the bosom part, I can vouch for this part in the holy book. So what prompts human beings to take their own lives? What pushes them to think that the life in a grave and in the bush is somewhat better than their current one? It is hogwash that when people die, they immediately go to our father in heaven.

It cannot be so, aren’t we all supposed to all go at the same time judgment day comes? Assuming we will all make the cut. An issue for another day.. although I would rather leave that one to religious leaders.

Speaking of religious leaders, lately it appears that they have a lot to handle. Suicide cases are on the rise and policemen are overwhelmed. An urgent solution is required and if I were to be assigned to that task I will first blame the clergy and their often weak line of defense- that no one has the right to judge. I submit that it’s hypocritical, even blasphemous. Isn’t a sin supposed to be called by its name? Save lives, save the flock, save yourselves.