Mother hopes daughter survives addiction
Leinanyana Tsiane | Friday July 11, 2014 14:22
Despite being disappointed by their children, most parents persevere. One such child, Botshelo (identity concealed) was intelligent and had a bright future ahead of her, but blighted it with the abuse of alcohol.
Not even a staunch Christian upbringing prevented the calamity Botshelo is facing. From Gantsi the family relocated to Gaborone for Botshelo’s father to pursue pastoral assignments.
Her parents enrolled Botshelo and her siblings in English medium schools as they wanted to give them the best opportunities they could offer. Botshelo later graduated with a Diploma in Secondary Education from Tonota College of Education (TCE). While excited about her teaching job at Itekeng Junior Secondary School in Gantsi, Botshelo suffered a stroke during her mid-career term. For some time she could not walk, but her mother nursed her back to health. However, she did not gain full use of her left leg and arm.
Not only that, her father died in a car accident leaving only her mother to care for her.
A businesswoman, mother and grandmother, Mma Botshelo struggled to care for her brood.
She told that life has not been kind to her ever since she discovered that her daughter is an alcoholic. She said her daughter was employed as a temporary teacher and got pregnant while there. “She gave birth to a baby boy and when the child was nine months she was admitted at Tonota College. It is so sad that her son later passed on,” she said.
Botshelo would later be transferred to Charles Hill School where she cohabitated with a man who fathered her second child.
“My daughter continued to drink while at Charles Hill and she was later involved in a road accident where she sustained a serious injury on her left wrist. It took a long time to heal. She was transferred to Sehithwa where she continued with her heavy drinking leading her to fall pregnant and give birth to her third child, a girl who is now in Form 2,” said Mma Botshelo.
Mma Botshelo stated that her daughter’s extreme drinking habits at Sehithwa continued saying people would call her to tell her about Botshelo’s drinking and that she would be seen drunk alone at night in the village. “One day my daughter requested that her daughter, son and niece stay with her at Sehithwa. I was skeptical but later gave in,” Mma Botshelo said.
Mma Botshelo said her daughter continued drinking and the school head eventually called about the welfare of the children. “The children did not stay long and I had to go and collect them. Botshelo was staying with her Charles Hill boyfriend who did not care that Botshelo was not well. I went to Sehithwa and found her sick and I took her to Gantsi where she was diagnosed with a chronic disease, a situation that depressed her a lot,” Mma Botshelo said. She returned to teaching in Gantsi after she was transferred back from Sehithwa.
“It was unfortunate that my daughter had bad friends who cared for her money only. They drank together using her money and did not care that she was unwell. She would withdraw money so they could all buy alcohol,” said Mma Botshelo.
Furthermore, Mma Botshelo said her daughter used to borrow money from loan sharks and yet she was not able to pay for her own daughter’s school fees. Because of this Mma Botshelo was obliged to pay her granddaughter’s fees. “At times the child would be sent home for non-payment of school fees and I was forced to pay. I did that to save the child from embarrassment,” she said.
The one thing that is consolation to the old woman is that she managed to build a small house with the aid of Botshelo through a loan. “As we speak I have found a tenant for her house and the money is used to pay her daughter’s school fees. At first she wanted to stay in the house but I refused because she needs someone to take care of her and I wanted the rent to help me take care of her daughter,” says Mma Botshelo adding that some of the money services the mortgage.
This arrangement did not go down well with Botshelo. Her mother said that because of this her daughter badmouths her.
“One day I was convinced that she was recovering and agreed to let her take care of her finances. It took that one day for me to realise that she was sending money to a Sangoma in Jwaneng. The Sangoma took advantage of her illness and promised to heal her completely,” said Mma Botshelo.
“The situation has not improved with regards to her drinking. I am however grateful to her colleagues who have shown tremendous support to her. I just pray that one day my daughter will get back to normal because she is intelligent despite her problems,” Mma Botshelo said.