Abandoned by parents, rejected by death
Nnasaretha Kgamanyane | Monday June 16, 2014 06:59
He says his mother left him with his father when he was two. But the father who had a wife and children never showed him any love. He says he was told that his mother, Tabona Ncube, is from Zimbabwe. His mother decided to go back to her country leaving him under the care of his stepmother and half siblings.
He says his father was abusive and at one point he ran away from home to live elsewhere. He says his father made him sleep in a room with no roof, windows or a door. He grew up in Nlapkhwane near Masunga in the North East District where he says he underwent the harshest treatment from the people who were supposed to be his guardians.
“I would sometimes go hungry for days as I was denied food by my family. I would go to their relatives and other people in the community begging for food. Some people tried to tell my father about my situation.
When sober, he would listen but when he was drunk, he ignored it. At first, I did not know that I was not one of them until they told me when I was in primary school. My cousins would mock me saying that I must go find my mother who abandoned me in Zimbabwe as I am not Motswana,” he says.
After he failed his junior certificate, he decided to stay with his father at Tsolamosese only to find himself in a much worse situation. Due to his father’s abuse, Ncube said that he went to stay with other relatives only to suffer the same ordeal. When he joined Madirelo Brigade in Ramotswa through assistance from the principal education officer, South East region, Lapologang Kgaodi, the relative he was staying with started mistreating him and stopped giving him food.
“One day when I got home, I found my clothes in the rubbish bin and blankets soaked in water. I did not know what I was supposed to do. The next day I fled to my friend’s house (in Old Naledi) where the situation was not any better,” he says.
He feels helpless because he does not know what to do. “I ran out of ideas on how I could deal with this harsh life and I have attempted to commit suicide a couple of times but for strange reasons, death has failed me,” he says.
Ncube says he once swallowed pills and drank car battery acid, but he survived after he was rushed to hospital for treatment. When he tried to hang himself, the rope snapped. He drank a chemical but he was once again taken to hospital for treatment.
He got a piece job and then stole a gun from his employer’s car to shoot himself but one of his colleagues saw him and stopped him. He dropped out of the Ramotswa Brigade because he is always in and out of hospital due to sicknesses. His medical record states that he has asthma and diabetes. He says that even though he is trying hard to turn his life around, the challenges he faces are too daunting. He appeals for help to find his mother.
Kgoadi says she has seen Ncube’s living conditions and he needs help. She met Ncube during the back-to-school programme registration. After hearing his story, she decided to investigate only to find that his situation was bad.
“He stays with his friends and we could not talk to his father. I decided to get him a place at Madirelo as he did not do well in his JC. Since then, I have been in touch with him and helped him where possible. I took him to the social workers who managed to buy him a bed, stove and gas cylinder. They are the ones who are responsible for providing him with accommodation but they are slow to process things,” she says.
Kgaodi says she always visits Ncube at his friends’ house and the living conditions there are not good though he gets a food basket coupon from social workers.
“I would love to give that child accommodation but I cannot do that because I am married. I also have to go through many legal procedures. I would like to call on the public to assist where they can to put a roof over the young man’s head as he is asthmatic and needs good accommodation,” she pleads.
Ncube’s father, Obed Masiya, has dismissed allegations that he mistreated him. He says it is impossible for him to live with Ncube because he fights him and he does not want to be controlled.
“Ngwana yole o mpaletse. Ga ke itse gore o batlang. Ke mo tsere ko gae fa a sena go faila Form Three le bone ba lela ka ene gore ke mathata fela. (That child has failed me. I don’t know what he wants. I took him from the village after my parents complained that he rebelled against them after he failed his Form 3),” he says.
Masiya says he took his son to his relatives who also told him that he fled from their house without notice. He says he does not know if he had hurt his son in any way as he tried hard to provide for him. He says that he would love to see his son again but he never visits him.