Responsibility, accountability forge fruitful alliances
Kealeboga Ngwigwa | Wednesday May 6, 2026 06:00
No one often wants to be the bigger person and admit that indeed it takes two to tango. There can never be fire without a spark. Moreover, it takes a friction or collision of two different things. You must run a match stick on the striker strip, then fire is born. In the ancient days, people used to strike two stones together until fire is ignited. Without the other, there is no way fire could be produced. Just as much in our lives, our actions must collide and cause certain emotions that would brew tension amongst ourselves. We fall out of relationships because we each contribute to a certain course.
It is very unfortunately that everyone wants to always appear as a saint before other and dump the whole responsibility on others. We like to point fingers to others immediately without checking and acknowledging our contributions in the act.
When someone says or does something, we do not just sit back and not respond, there is something that we do in order to retaliate and try to balance or square the hurt they imposed on us.
We are too prideful and ego centric to accept our dues in the matter. Holy as ever. We turn a blind eye to the fact that some respond proportionally to how we first sent the message. I cannot sneeze just from nothing.
My sinuses would have encountered a reaction prompter. The one thing that you should be cognisant of is your reaction and appreciate the posture your response was based on. If you were angry, embrace that fact and know that what you also received from that reaction was influenced by the initial action. If you are true to yourself, you will earn an opportunity to grow and become better in life.
We look into our actions in order to identify our flaws and work positively towards curbing them in the future rather than not acknowledging something which then happen to repeat itself in your future relationships.
You do not accept responsibilities so that you can impress the other party, but for personal development and learning your mistakes. Once you understand all that, you will never cry foul of the same in the future.
Denial is a bad seed and its harvest is very bitter. Some people divorce and when you assess the reasoning, you find out that it is only lack of accountability that has earned them such a bad status in our communities.
They just were full of denial of their own actions due to the ego that they chose to hedge themselves with. Sometimes they feel that they will be spoiling their partners if they stand up to take responsibility for their contributions.
When you become accountable and responsible for your action, it fosters trust between you and the other party since there is no blaming of one another. The other party will embrace your sincerity and become open enough so that you both can understand each other and ultimately draw a mutual conclusion of the matter.
It is a lot easy to yield a quality of respect where there is no resentment. Hence, the conflicts are solved amicably and faster. When both parties take responsibility of their contributions to the conflict, it becomes easy for them to communicate, iron out the differences and eventually secure healthy emotions for one another. The moment one starts to point fingers and make themselves invisible in the cause of actions, it becomes a furore to the other and nothing they will do afterwards would be appealing to the next.
The situation normally spirals out of control and at times makes the relationship to be irreversible broken. Taking responsibility for your action does not show weakness since it takes so much courage to do so, thus, it is a sign for a strong character.
*Kealeboga Ronald Ngwigwa is an Author, Columnist, Trainer, Radio Feature Presenter, Motivational Speaker, and an Entrepreneur. He believes that beauty awaits to be born of anyone, despite our shortfalls. Call him on +26771830584 +26772522213 to enquire about his services, or email: krcoloringsouls@gmail.com