INK SPILLS
Thulaganyo Jankey | Wednesday April 15, 2026 10:03
Who approved the idea of a four-day weekend followed immediately by responsibility? That seems like pure unadulterated whiplash. For a good four days you were living the soft life but now you have to respond ‘noted, thanks’ to emails you don’t even understand. Let’s be honest – half of us are still running on • 30% easter eggs • 50% vibes • 20% denial This is a whole week after Easter. Productivity? We will get back to that one perhaps after another two weeks. I believe that the labour laws should be tweaked to allow people to recover from Easter holidays before they are expected to start stapling papers and doing any sort of meaningful productive work. Before you dismiss my suggestion think about those pilgrimages to Moria, Durban, Matsiloje or Tsetsebye.
That takes money, long distance travel and grumpy spouses who have been dragged along because they do not take their Easter holidays and Jesus seriously enough. Then there are those who were Jesus and had to carry a wooden cross and wear a thorny crown. Tell me how are you expected back at work after wearing a hat made exclusively of thorns? Firstly the sinners – who form 75% of the workforce – are going to have a field day (even week) laughing at your brief stint as Jesus. Then you have to recover from the pricks from the thorns and this depends on the fury of the thorns your crown was made of. One hopes those who were made Jesus during Easter don’t take this too far and start believing they are Jesus. In Zimbabwe some time ago one faith-drunk Christian tried to walk on water and promptly drowned and died for a very long time. We hope these stunts of ‘Jesusing’ congregants have the proper PG label if only to avoid the Zim guy situation.
The miracle healing churches don’t seem to be caught up in the easter craze. Remember those churches whose pastors tried to adapt—offering ‘virtual healings’ over Zoom during COVID-19 times. But buffering miracles couldn’t quite hit the same. ‘You’re healed... healed... healed...’ connection lost. Third world connectivity can steal many a pastor’s thunder. When all is said and done a long weekend like Easter doesn’t relax you – it reveals you. Day one you promise yourself to reset, read and maybe become a better person. But by day three your true nature has entered the chat. And then Tuesday hits and suddenly you are expected to be a functioning member of society again – like you didn’t just spend the past 3 days dancing on tables at the neighbourhood pub and promising people jobs and drinks in equal measure. Does a long weekend change one? No it doesn’t, it just peels back the mask and says ‘Ah yes, this is who you really are’ (For comments, feedback and insults email inkspills1969@gmail.com) *Thulaganyo Jankey is a training consultant who runs his own training consultancy that provides training in BQA- accredited courses. His other services include registering consultancies with BQA and developing training courses. Contact him on 74447920 or email ultimaxtraining@gmail.com.