Are SMMEs The Future

Thulaganyo Jankey | Wednesday September 3, 2025 10:07

SMMEs are the present, the past. I believe the first business ever was an SMME, and the last business in operation on Judgment Day would also be an SMME. SMMEs do not have the time to spend deciphering government forms written in ancient bureaucratic language. They are instant businesses that are basically founded on hunger, WhatsApp groups, and a stern face when confronted by bye-law officers. Their storefront is a status update. Their marketing strategy? Emojis and flash sales at midnight. Their business hours are ‘whenever we feel like it.’ It’s hustle and heart, not spreadsheets and audits and overbearing managers and menacing boards. They are the economic mosquitoes –impossible to swat and everywhere. Behind every business plan (if you could call it that, as it resides in the business owner’s brain) is a WhatsApp group, a cousin who’s ‘good with graphics,’, an uncle who is a procurement officer, and a dream powered by a guarana-infused Redbull.

The human resource is a classic case of doing more with less. In fact, it is actually doing more with less. Picture this: family members double as HR, marketing, and security. So, if you are unlucky enough to have a relative who runs a small business, you could one day be called to provide some expertise in adding figures and subtracting expenses with no pay whatsoever. Your muscles could be engaged to out-harass a stubborn or violent customer. You don’t even have to have won any fight previously. I remember when my uncle had a small business, and I was the cash-in-transit officer responsible for depositing money at the bank. Back then, there were not many cash-in-transit heists, and half the hood knew I was the one doing the bank deposits. In fact, I was so poor at my job that whenever people asked where I was going, I would tell them I was going to the bank to deposit the previous day’s takings. I was part of the staff with no rewards.

SMMEs have very unorthodox interview questions that take the form • Can you start now? • Do you have your own laptop? Yes, the question could get tougher, like being asked to talk about a time you made a huge mistake at work. This is not really about the specifics of the mistake, but more about them wanting to know if you're capable of admitting to it without bursting into tears. This is rare, though, because interviews for SMME jobs are usually done on site amidst the added pressure of having to start peeling the potatoes to prepare the fries. The performance review system is simple and very interesting. The boss or uncle just comes over to your ‘desk’, stares at you for a minute, gives a scowl or a smile, and then wanders off. The last time I had a ‘formal’ meeting about a salary increase, I was told to ‘just work harder and stop asking so many questions.’ The best part, though, is when someone gets fired. There’s no formal meeting or severance package. The boss just takes their peeler or chip slicer and puts it on a different table. Everyone knows what it means. It’s a silent, dramatic, and surprisingly efficient way to let someone know their services are no longer required. It's the ultimate ‘unsolicited peeler transfer.’ If our economy were a football match, SMMEs would be the super sub who ends up saving the game. Small and medium businesses breathe life into the economy and are the heartbeat of local communities.

So yes, SMMEs may not have huge budgets, but they’ve got grit, memes, and the ability to turn a side hustle into a national treasure. And they exploit us relatives. We are still awaiting our first cheques – pats on the back do not buy a Choppies combo. Sigh! We don’t even have unions to speak for us! (For comments, feedback, and insults, email inkspills1969@gmail.com) Thulaganyo Jankey is a Rapporteur and training consultant who runs his own training consultancy that provides training in BQA- BQA-accredited courses. His other services include registering consultancies with BQA and developing training courses. Contact him on 74447920 or email ultimaxtraining@gmail.com