‘Cultural norms, a barrier to men’s mental health’
Pini Bothoko | Tuesday April 8, 2025 11:38
This was revealed by a psychologist, Tsholo Zion, when discussing the reasons why GBV continues to rise despite efforts in place to curb this scourge. In an interview with this publication, Zion highlighted that cultural norms and elitism serve as significant barriers to men's mental well-being.
She noted that despite ongoing discussions among various stakeholders on how to curb GBV, little attention is given to the mental health struggles that men experience, often in silence.
Zion emphasised that traditional beliefs and societal expectations place undue pressure on men to suppress their emotions. She stated that many men live under the silhouette of the phrase 'men don't cry,' which discourages them from seeking help when they are struggling with mental health issues.
“These beliefs have a dangerous depredation on the mental health of the male gender. A simple example would be the upbringing of two children, a boy and a girl, at a tender age, the girl child often receives a warm and comforting gesture when faced with anti social behaviors from peers, on the other hand, a boy child will always receive criticism and words like ‘o sematla o ledisiwa ke balekane ba gago’. These kinds of words lead the boy to bottle things up in fear of being labeled,” she said.
Zion stated that the bottling up of things often comes back to haunt the boy child as there is, in most case,s a volcanic eruption of emotions. She added that usually, suppression of emotions are a results of the belief that when a man seeks help, this is in most cases viewed as a sign of weakness or failure.
“This always has a negative consequence on men's well-being or mental health. Talk about the obligation that a parent or society at large has in the upbringing of a boy child, it is not in dispute that the female gender has most of the time received the pain end of GBV, but if the problem is addressed by eliminating the boy child, how are we solving this escalating problem? This stigma ultimately leads to emotional suppression, which can manifest in harmful behaviors, including violence,” she said.
Zion added that usually, the eruption of such emotions mostly targets the female person leading to GBV because their negative emotions were suppressed over a long period. She argued that at the time such emotions erupt, there is no way one can expect something pleasant to happen.
“This explains why GBV cases continue to rise despite all the efforts to empower women because a lot of men are bottling emotions. However, some strategies can be implemented on a larger scale to address this social ill, which has become the topic of interest in most levels of leadership, including the government. One of the strategies that it won't be harmful to explore in our country will be that of education, elementary education to be precise. Foundation is an important aspect of human development. Therefore, laying the right foundation of development is paramount,” Zion argued.
She said since education is a way of laying down a foundation, it will be good to revise the primary schools syllabus or curriculum to align it with the times. She stated that strategies currently employed to curb GBV include but not limited to teaching the grownups emotional intelligence, anger management, and respectful relationships.
“To be honest, it is very difficult to bring about lasting impact on someone who is already formed. However, if these same teachings can be incorporated in the syllabus/curriculum of primary school education, for children to learn them while still they are in their formative stages of development, this will have a lasting impact on them as they will grow up with these embedded in them, they will be socialized into these behaviors,” she said.
Zion said that at a younger age, children are still forming, and it is easy to decide what is put into them.
“If we leave them empty, something undesirable will fill them. It’s already evident with the many generations that came before us, even our very own. Right now, the current strategies are trying to address issues such as emotional intelligence, anger management, and stress management just to mention but a few of the perpetrators, but it is honestly not easy to change the behaviour that is already formed and has become a part of one’s lifestyle,” she said.
Zion further pointed out that the lack of safe spaces for men to express their emotions without judgment exacerbates the problem. In many cultural settings, showing vulnerability is often equated with weakness, leaving men with limited avenues for emotional support.
Zion urged policymakers and mental health practitioners to consider more inclusive approaches when tackling GBV and mental health issues. “We need to create platforms that encourage men to speak out about their struggles without fear of stigma. Mental health services should be made more accessible and culturally sensitive to encourage help-seeking behavior among men,” she said.
Her sentiments align with global research, which indicates that untreated mental health issues among men contribute to aggressive behavior, substance abuse, and suicide. Addressing these underlying mental health concerns could play a vital role in reducing cases of GBV and promoting a healthier society.
As Botswana continues its fight against GBV, experts continue to stress the importance of a holistic approach that includes addressing men's mental health challenges. Breaking cultural stereotypes and fostering an environment where men feel safe to seek help could be a crucial step toward a more equitable and violence-free society.