Ensure you are insured

Thulaganyo Jankey | Tuesday August 30, 2022 06:44

The script is usually predictable. First there’s an argument about who is wrong. After a few verbal exchanges the less vocal one somewhat concedes with a ‘let’s call the police’ refrain. And then the script veered off course with one motorist nastily claiming the other guy did not have motor vehicle insurance. That is when violence almost erupted.

Motorists involved in accidents still don’t realise that fighting after an accident does not result in the vehicles getting fixed but only adds to their sins. Many of us think insurance companies are made of Devil molecules. But they are not that bad though. Insurance companies are actually descendants of Judas but a more washed-up form of the man who sold Jesus. My encounter with insurance dates back to the early 90s when a man holding a briefcase in a suit knocked at my door. This was the time when such characters had more clout unlike now. Nowadays when you see a man in a suit holding a briefcase you know for certain he’s a scammer especially when he’s a pedestrian. Honest men in suits and dangling briefcases should be driving a certain form of motorised transport.

This was a sleek man adept at navigating every hurdle and before I knew it, I was swallowing hard and my excuse bundles ran out and I signed a life insurance policy which up to now I have not benefited from. Oh wait, I have to pass on to the other world to actually cash on it.

This I realised after the sleek man had left as I was poring through the fine print. I had filled in so many forms that my fingers had developed little blisters and somehow it looked easier to pay the monthly premium until I died than refill the forms so I could benefit before I passed on. My blistered fingers said no and Sleek Man was gone forever. So here I am, waiting to benefit but not wishing to die. Later on my life improved and the pressure to own a motor vehicle spiked. This was mainly because the fairer sex was not listening enough to my romantic requests. For most of us in our early 20s this was the reason – the only one – we bought vehicles. This meant I encountered a second type of insurance – motor vehicle insurance.

This was before civilisation when Japanese and Singaporean vehicle traders had not discovered our market. The finance agent – because he was somehow in cahoots with the insurance guys to fleece us our not-always hard-earned cash – always insisted that you buy insurance for the vehicle they would be financing. So for many of us behind that smile as we drove out was deep welts of worry regarding what we will be eating the following month thanks to that insurance deduction. Later on I got tired of Ministry of Health clinics queues.

Actually I got frustrated going to the clinic and finding nurses without those little nursing caps. For me a proper nurse has to have that little cap for me to believe they are competent enough to flush out my ailments. So I got health insurance in the belief that the ones in private practice will have the little caps. Alas! There was no such luck but I was stuck now with health insurance. My only saving grace was the nurses there were a bit on the kinder side than those in public facilities. I once tried to buy fire insurance for my house and the salesman was highly suspicious of my intentions.

Most insurance companies would prefer not to sell you fire insurance, because then they might be required to pay YOU money, and that is certainly not why they got into the insurance business in the first place. All these assaults on my salary meant my salary advice slip had a PG label of sorts. Something like ‘Do Not Open In Front of Colleagues’. Truth is life insurance and vehicle insurance are like the difference between being thrown from the 15th and 16th floor – they both kill you.

(For comments, feedback and insults email inkspills1969@gmail.com) Thulaganyo Jankey is a training consultant who runs his own training consultancy that provides training in BQA- accredited courses. His other services include registering consultancies with BQA and developing training courses. Contact him on 74447920 or email ultimaxtraining@gmail.com.