If you have been reading this column for a while, then you know that I believe strongly in the power of strong families.
As such, my husband and I created a marriage talk show which is currently airing on Botswana Television, but can also be downloaded on our website www.ashleythaba.com. It is also the reason why we just published a book which is an in depth relationship guide to help you with all things to do with relationships.
That book is also available to download off our website. If you would like to get closer with your spouse, then this book is a step by step very practical guide with loads of role plans and examples to really help you grow in emotional intimacy.
Today, I thought I would share an excerpt from the chapter on Preparing for Marriage from the book.
I hope it will help encourage you if you are considering getting married. I also believe it will encourage you even if you are already married. The question was asked during our television show, “You have spoken about purpose, but many people do not know their purpose. How does a person determine their purpose?”
Below is our answer:
Ask yourself a few of these questions:
1) What makes me excited?
2) What makes me feel fulfilled in life?
3) When I get up in the morning, what are the things I most look forward to doing in the day?
4) What drives me in the decisions I make?
5) What do others affirm I am good at that makes a positive impact on those around me?
Another thing to be mindful of is that purpose deals with people not things. If your purpose is tied up in your job and you lose it, do you feel lost? What is it that I live for to do for other people while I am here on planet earth? Your job may give you an avenue to do that but the purpose of serving others defines you, not the job itself. Your purpose has to be deeper than the job you have or the material things that you have around you so that if those things are gone, your purpose is still there.
Once you figure out your purpose, look for someone to marry who
If you have NOT figured out your purpose, then you will look for someone to pass the time with. You will aimlessly do life together just going with the flow of humanity – get up, go to work, come home, go to bed, eat, repeat…. And after a while, you get bored and depressed! You were made to live to make a difference, not to go through life on auto-pilot! Your life was meant to be exciting! In John 10:10, Jesus says I have come so you might have life to the FULLEST! If you don’t find that excitement in living a life of purpose, you will probably turn to illicit or illegal activities in an effort to put “spice” in your life.
Some examples will one day be cheating on your spouse to feel “alive and in love” again, doing drugs to make you feel “high”, or pursuing money at all costs because you feel having more riches will ultimately make you feel fulfilled and fill that void in your boring life. These actions will ultimately destroy your marriage.
For more practical questions and answers, check out the website: www.ashleythaba.com . It is our prayer that God would use the words we are speaking to help people’s lives become more fulfilling and their homes stronger and more enjoyable. We firmly believe stronger families will make for stronger nations!
Ashley Thaba is a popular motivation speaker, author and the Producer of a hit TV show offering practical advice to strengthen families and improve marriages! Episodes of her show can be downloaded from her website – www.ashleythaba.com.You can view some of her work on her YouTube channel: Ashley Thaba. You can buy three of her books, Dive In, Making Marriages Fun, and Conquering the Giants, on her website. You can email her at HYPERLINK “mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org” email@example.com or follow her on Facebook at: Talking with the Thabas