Women are active participants of their own "victimization"
Friday, 06 July, 2012I have observed the many cases of women who falsely vilify men, even through media. While some cases are genuine, others, when probed further reveal planned Jezebel and Deliah-like antics. Changing laws and women's rights/liberation, has seemingly made it easy for women to blame men for everything. Are we breeding a society of women who revel in being 'victims'?
In my capacity as a blogger, and not a 'journalist' as some of my unenlightened "friends" presume me to be, I enjoy the liberty of personal research and practical observations, not the submerged 'intellectual' researches compiled by fellows who probably lost touch with reality since Pepe jeans went out of fashion.
Women should know that respect doesn't fall like "manna from the sky", but is earned. From those who desperately trade sex for men's affections, deviously orchestrate unplanned pregnancies to "trap" men and sometimes claim rape to "fix" them. To those who frequent bars, consume large amounts of alcohol and dance like brazen hussies: legs wide open, buttocks and thighs jiggling in the air, shaking waists wildly, mouths hung half open, with a bottle in one hand; gyrating dizzyingly, up and down, as if demonstrating an unknown Kama Sutra position. Isn't it expected that men will treat them with disdain and view them in a sexual manner, nothing more?
A lot of women freely entertain and galavant with men, only to turn around and play victim when things don't go the way they had hoped.
It’s like those often obese and plain, "woman rights" propagandists who demonize beauty contests and hip-hop music videos, claiming they degrade women. Are women ever forced to gyrate or parade half naked in front of strange men?
My sentiments may appear parochial, but not ignorant to the reality of impressions. People don't communicate everything verbally and we often rely on signs and actions.
Unfortunately, we exist in a society that moulds people on false idealism. A lot of women lean to culture when it suites them. When they are broke and needy, "a man's job is to provide for a woman" but when they are being tjatjarag, "its their right, times have changed and women can do as they please". The inconsistencies and hypocrisies are mind-boggling.
We glamourize women struggle and victimization. A woman who "suffers" is applauded, compared to those who are practical and selfish their decisions. Even in 2012, we have a tolerance for and embrace women who breed children like they have never heard of contraceptives, or are in a competition - sometimes having numerous children- even when unmarried or economically disadvantaged. Alice Walker once controversially stated that women having children, especially those they cannot afford is akin to self-slavery.
The catch-22 is that these women agree to have those children, even without mutual consent of their partners. Whoever told women that when you have a child with a man he will love or marry you needs to be kicked in the back. Many women consciously and gullibly fall for men's usual "getting into your pants" antics. Some say, "Ke batla ngwana", with such candid casualness, you would think "ngwana" is a can of coke. Men can turn an otherwise decent woman into a whore and its the prerogative of women to choose what types they want to be. 'No' is a word with a solid meaning.
The only protection against injustice in a person is power, whether physical or financial. Girls are children trained to be docile, dull and apologetic for having career or wealth amass ambitions. It starts from a young age where they are fed an intellectually numbing diet of romantic novels, songs and movies; and they fixate on illusions of miracles and knights in shining armours. They even distort their self esteem and sense of self, playing with dolls that resemble white ladies, sub-consciously planting inferiority complexes; hence a lot of our women are obsessed with Caucasian looking hair, light skinned complexions, equating beauty with Western ideals of looking as impossibly perfect as possible, even at the cost of one's sanity.
Women need to self persevere to enjoy a quality life. It’s imperative to engage on how women seemingly exploit their freedom and rights, which requires taking off rose tinted glasses. In the same breath, as I noted in, 'Let men be and men and women and women', we must draw a line between women behaving like men and being affirmative, while retaining their feminine element. However, as Thomas Gray once famously said, 'Alas, regardless of their doom, the little victims play! No sense have they of ills to come, nor care beyond today.'